MARK'S... ------------------------------------------------------------ * * * *** * * ***** * ***** ***** ***** ***** *** * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *** * *** * * *** *** * * * * * * * * * * * * * ***** *** * ***** ***** ***** * * ***** * * ------------------------------------------------------------ Volume 3 ~ Issue 9 ~ 26 February 2000 (C)2000 Mark Krell ------------------------------------------------------------ OK... So I've been busy... But enough has happened to deserve an issue... Don't fret... I'll tell you everything I can remember... Well, mostly... ------------------------------------------------------------------- THE NUMBERS GAME... I've been encouraging a very nice lady I know not to take personal the actions of men she has encountered who don't have their priorities in order for many different reasons which vary with the individual... Basically, she tends to interpret their crazy behavior as their personal rejection of her... I've been reassuring her about how worthwhile she is, and that seeking a new partner in mid-life is essentially a numbers game... You need a lot of exposures to new partner prospects to find your good one. And, it's harder because of this reality... If they're single now, there is a reason for them being single... You know the truth of it... Marriages that fail, fail because both of the partners failed to look at each other as parts of themselves... Adversary relationships are doomed to failure even though some of them don't make it all the way to divorce court. Not always knowing that you're hearing the truth makes it harder still... That some men deliberately lie, women know... I promise you that there are women who are not truthful as well... I don't think that one has to be perfect to be a good marriage partner, but I believe they do have to be well intentioned and truthful... Waitaminute... Let's get back to me bragging about being right in looking at the new partner search as a numbers game... :) So she would tell me about this guy or the other guy and I'd tell her I didn't understand why she wasted thought and concern about these crazy men... I think she's won this time... She's met a guy WHO IS ACTING LIKE HE WANTS HER!... I can't think of any way to rain on her parade!... Everything she says about him tells me he's a nice sincere civilized guy! Don't misunderstand me... I don't take credit for anything!... Well, maybe for encouraging her to continue... Nah!, she probably would've done that anyway... It really IS a numbers game... That's what keeps me from getting in a bad mood from all of the rejections I get... And, heavier ladies reading this will get some satisfaction from this... I've been making some new friends as a result of my setting up a chess board in front of the coffee shop at our local shopping mall... One new friend is about 35 years old and now divorced from a faithless wife... He tells me he's about to start dating the office manager where he works... This nice and nice looking guy says he's prepared to love all 220 pounds of her... He may be in the minority of men, but he does exist... The search for him is just harder... Which brings us back to... It's a numbers game! ---------------------------------------------------------------------- ANYBODY GOT A CUP OF PENCILS? After eating at the mall food court, I usually go outside the entrance for some fresh air for a bit... Yesterday, a lady and her about 11 years old daughter approached the entrance and seeing me the lady gave her girl $2 which the daughter came over and offered the money to me... With a smile I explained to the little girl that I really didn't need her money, but that I was happy to see that she had such a kind heart... It was OK... What I wanted to do was ask her if her mother was married, but that might have upset the mother... Whaddaya think?... Some dark glasses and an old Army jacket?... I might be a going concern. --------------------------------------------------------------------- UPDATES ON "THE SEARCH"... One lady wrote telling me that I am probably the handsomest man she's ever seen... I thanked her and referred her to the together page... Never heard from her again. ----- I wrote a lady telling her how beautiful she is... I also told her not to get too excited because I might be a frog... Before going to my together page she writes asking if she kisses me will I be her prince... What do you think I said?... After reading my page I never heard from her again. ----- A new phenomina... Now, I'm getting ladies who don't want to or can't read my page... They tell me that they'd rather get to know me through emails... And here I thought I did good by taking the time to make a rather full disclosure up front... ----- A real estate lady drew a shift working a kiosk (little stand in the mall for our foriegn readers) for the company she works for... On her break she was chatting with a vendor... As she left him he called over to me and said, "She'll sell your house for you!"... She's a nice looking lady so I said to her, "But if you sell my home. I won't have any place to take you home and keep you!"... She smiled and sat down and we chatted for a few minutes... I told her, "If I see you in here again, I'm gonna invite you out to dinner!"... If you're wondering why I put it that way, it was to not get her to make a committment to go some place with me faster than she could catch up with her reactions to me. I do have another problem with this lady, but for reasons that you might not quickly think about... She's another race and while a lady's color does not matter to me as long as her heart and mind are colored LOVE, what does matter is that here is a place called GEORGIA and that not all people are kind... I'd hate to put a nice lady in a position in which some folks will be unkind to her... For myself, do you think I really care what stupid people think?... She has another shift early in march and if she says hello to me I'm gonna keep my promise, but the people problem will have to be addressed at some point if anything happens. ------------------------------------------------------------------ FORIEGN LADIES... We exchanged emails on a daliy basis... She wrote... A message from "********" to "eiwbunny": Hi, I read your words from your profile which on AFF. I can see you are a very excellent man. Maybe it is the destiny. I could find you through the AFF. I am very interested in all about you. I would like to know more about yourself if you like. Now, please let me something about myself. I am a Chinese lady. My hometown is in the North of China. It is not large town. Will you laugh at me if I tell you that I have taken much concern about you after reading your words? I look forward to receiving your reply soon. Good wishes from the bosom of the heart. My email address is : *************.cn My handle on AFF is : "********" Could you give me your free email address then I can send my picture to you. Sincerely ******** This is a copy of my profile: Let me introduce myself. I am a Chinese lady.I am 37 years old .165cm.60kg. I am a very warm, pretty and honest lady.I was divorce.I want to look for someone who is a goodness and loyalism and duty person. I live in a not large city which is in the North of China. My favorites colour is black. My favorites flower is rose. My favorites food is Chinese food. My favorites season is autumn. I like music, sing, looking, cooking, and reading... I think that the west man is kind man so I want to look for someone to be my husband I can trust. Maybe it is destiny that I could find you on AFF and we coould form our happy family and have our happy life together.If you like... Please sent your e-mail to me.Then we could understand each other well. I dream of a happy family. I look forward to form a happy family with a nice man who I can trust. Are you the one? Sent On: February 22,2000 I wrote... Dear ********, Thank you very much for your nice letter... Your writing has made me feel very good... Your letter also has made me like you... I want to congratulate you on your good use of English... Second languages are difficult because we think in the language we grew up with.... I appreciate that you would like to know more about me... I have written a web page which tells a lot about me, which I invite you to visit with your internet browser at http://eiw.com/together/ Many things about me you will like, but nobody is perfect... I have told the best and the worst about me on my web page. If there is anything you do not understand on my page, please write and I will be happy to explain... I am a very kind and loving man... I am not rich, but not poor... I own my own home... I like what you've written in your profile... I put my profile at asiafriendfinder.com because I know that chinese ladies are very sincere... I want a lady who will love me as much as I will love her... You will always hear the truth from me... Please read my page... I am hoping that you will still be interested in me after reading my page, but if you are not I wish you every happiness. Mark Krell I also wrote (a few minutes later)... Dear ********, I just saw your photo at asiafriendfinder.com... You are a lovely woman... You are so beautiful that I am afraid you will not be interested in me... If I find a lady half as pretty as you, I will feel very lucky. Tzai Chen, Mark She wrote... Hi,Mark how are you? Thanks for the letter you sent to me. I just come back from my work. And found you e-mail, I'm very happy. I want write a letter to you talk more about myself to you, but my english is not really good enough. So I trying to write this short letter to you to let you know I recived you letter. And I will write a long letter to you as soon as prossiable.I send my picture to you following this email. Hope you like it. Wish you have nice day.( now is day time at your time) write to you soon and write to me soon too. your freind ******** I wrote... Thank you ******** for writing so soon... I know that reading my web page will not be very easy for you, but it will tell you much about me... http://eiw.com/together/ Try reading the page and see how much you can understand. I repeat that I think you are a lovely woman. Mark She wrote... Hello Mark I received your email. Thanks very much. I read your web page but I can not read it well quickly. So I want to know about you via your email and I think it is better to be talking with each other. What do you think about? Now I need stop because my mother just call me to tell me she miss me and I am going to look in her. good wish from my heart waiting for you ******** I wrote... Dear ********, I know that it is hard for you to say what you think and feel in English... I can not say what I think and feel in Chinese... I also know that you can not easily read my web page because of the way it is written in English... I am an educated man, and my word choices are not easy for you to understand because English is not your native language. Because of this, I am going to tell you about me in emails, and I will use easier words because of the language problem that we share... I am a loving man... I am a kind man... I am a friendly man... I have good friends... I believe that a good love is not "you and me", a good love is "us"... I have never been unkind to a lady... In business I can be strong... With a lady I am a gentle sensitive man... I live in my own small home in the small city of Buford, Georgia which is 45 miles (60 kilometers) North-East of Atlanta, Georgia which is a very big city)... I live with "Candy" my small dog... I call Candy "The Boss" because she has me well trained :) I am single (divorced) now because my ex-wife had mental problems... She is now in jail because she tried to kill her brother. I enjoy living a nice quiet peaceful life filled with love and happiness. I am not a rich man, but I live clean and do not want for much. I am a loving passionate man and I have a good sense of humor. This you must also know... A few years ago, I lost my feet and I use a wheelchair to move around... I am not a sad case and I have fun in my life... I move around well and I go where I want and do mostly anything I want to do. If this causes you to think and feel differently about me, I will understand, and I will think only nice thoughts about you. You are a very beautiful lady, and I believe you are a nice lady too. I believe you are entitled to find a good happiness even if you decide that it is not with me. I also should tell you that I want a nice peaceful life, and that I do not want to have children. I worry about one thing... If your mother misses you now, what would she do if you found a western man and you left China? I smile at another thought... If you are as beautiful a person as your face is beautiful... :) Mark After three days of no further response, I wrote... I am thinking about a nice lady in China named ********... I am hoping that she is not feeling badly... She is a lovely woman who deserves to find her happiness... I wish for her Good Jos! (Jos is the Chinese word for Luck) Mark ----------------------------------------------------------------- WHY A LOT OF MEN MARRY YOUNGER LADIES... Walk the mall with me or sit with me at the coffee shop... Any evening will have you observe 15 to 20 women make a point of getting my attention and saying hello to me... A few will come over and hug me... A lot of men say hello too, but that's not the point here... I've always been able to meet new people and make new friends... That still works in spite of the chair... Here's the point... While men of all ages are friendly to me, I don't believe there's a single woman over 45 who is friendly to me... They're always younger... Now, who's not giving who a chance???... I assure you that my smile to a lady my age is every bit as warm as it is to everyone else. ---------------------------------------------------------------- WIVES WHO STOP BEING WIVES... You remember I promised to address the question of why... Because there's no one answer and to keep from getting too depressing, Im going to break this topic up into "featurettes" over several issues... And, I'll touch on the only simple answer first... Some women lie by representing themselves as having a sincere interest in and appreciation of passion and lovemaking because they know how strong an attractant this will be to their target man. They reap the rewards of this foolish behavior by having to deal with a resentful and unhappy man when their interest fades after they have secured the level of committment they want from him. Because there are men to whom these things are not important, these women cheat themselves by not selecting someone with whom they are similarly paced. Having been the victim of such deception, I would now advise any man who finds himself in this position to get out quickly because it doesn't get better with the passage of time... And, if she's lied to you about something this fundamental, you ain't gonna get a square deal with her no way no time! That there are ladies who "can do without it" doesn't bother me... What bothers me is when they're not honest about it. If you're a lady being approached by a man who makes this claim about his wife, ask yourself how somebody who can't straighten out his own life is going to be able to love you well. Of course, if you're afraid to get into a healthy relationship, you're gonna say yes to him because he's safe, aren't you? --------------------------------------------------------------- Previous LoveLetters can be read at http://eiw.com/loveletters/ Feel free to recommend LoveLetters to those of your friends to whom it may be helpful or entertaining... http://eiw.com/loveletters/ If you no longer wish to receive LoveLetters, send an email to me with "No More LoveLetters" as the subject. ----------------------------------------------------------- end of issue. |